I am the proud parent of a healthy, vibrant little boy. At the time of authoring this article, he is going on 19 months. My son is, if I may borrow from one of the time-honored cliches, the apple of my eye. He makes me laugh, cry with joy ... and want to rip my hair out on a daily basis. He is, after all, an active toddler. And while Id like to think hes perfect, there are plenty of experts out there who keep telling me hes not quite on par with other kids his age.

Any new parent quickly realizes that baby milestones, growth charts and development quizzes factor into the equation of raising a child today as much as other key topics like breast feeding vs. bottle and choices in diaper brands. In fact, I look forward to my sons periodic pediatrician visits even less than he does -- and hes the one getting the shots. You see, each visit Im inundated with informational hand outs and quizzed on my sons development. For some questions the answers are easy to let fly: hes weaned off the bottle; hes not hooked on a pacifier or a "lovie" stuffed animal. Other questions I dread. "Is he walking? Talking? Enrolled in a 4-year degree program at Harvard by now? And the answers: "Just started about a month ago." "Wont mumble a peep besides dada." "Actually, hes not even in a playgroup." make me feel like Im doing something wrong.

There have been several visits where the pediatrician has told me shed like to see my son accomplishing a milestone by now, followed by a firm deadline and a threat of a referral to a specialist if he doesnt comply. Funny, these arent tests for which you can cram. And secondly, my son isnt buying in. Ive quickly learned that he does things on his own time ... period.

As if the stern warnings from the doctor arent enough, Im also tortured by the e-mails that get delivered to my inbox if not on a daily basis, surely a weekly one. For every baby Web site to which Ive registered, there is a "helpful" newsletter or tips sheet they send out to keep you abreast of your childs progress -- from eating solids to reciting all 50 states and their capitals. Lets just say my son has rarely if ever met any of the standard milestones. Today, I patiently await his first words when he should be on to two-word phrases. It seems every other toddler is scaling steps and running, while my little guy is still mastering getting across a room without tripping over his feet. I honestly spend more time worrying about what I can do to foster his learning ability and make the grade in time for the next well visit, than making the most of just playing and having a good time.

I do understand these guidelines are out there to serve as an early diagnosis for children who may have real developmental delay. But I say, give me a break when its evident that my child has intelligence and is developing nicely. He can recognize body parts; knows who his parents are; gets a kick out of chasing the dog; and dutifully heads up to bed upon my uttering the words, "time to go to sleep."

Therefore, I resolve to stop reading the tortuous e-mails, comparing my son to his peers, and taking to heart the well-intentioned words uttered at the pediatricians office. My little boy will get around to everything in due time. He has a lifetime of making the grade and passing the test. For now, Im content to just let him be an inquisitive and loveable kid.

About the Author

Jeanette is the founder of the Web-based writing service j.c.w. Creative Writing Source available at www.icanwrite4u.com